there were tears in her eyes as she dropped down dead...
his suspicious nature killed her they said...
a slash on her wrist with the broken glass in hand...
a token of love to him who'd always question but never understand!
PROMPT taken from 3ww the words being 'glass' 'token' and 'question'
beautifully written...
ReplyDeleteu write those words of fiction so well that it makes me wonder at times, whether its for real or fiction!!!
i really dont like sad endings, but yes, this one has more meaning to it... something to look into. :)
Cheers Pri!!!
but would still insist, you try some happy ending next time, or may be beginning as far as this is concerned :P
and if u need to cheer up ur mood, then guess u can watch Desperate Housewives... :P
Still prompt well executed!!!
//a token of love to him who'd always question but never understand!//
ReplyDeleteand this is wat i was talkin abt, meaningful!!! :)
Killing oneself for a selfish person, I don't understand this...
ReplyDeleteMaybe it is just me...
cheated out
Love can make us do some very foolish things...
ReplyDelete@Gautami
ReplyDeletewell, as they say
Love is Blind!!!
and as i say
Its all abt giving, not taking
@ ankur
ReplyDeletethanks ankur...and yes will attempt something 'happy' soon :)
@ gautami tripathy
well thats the sensible way gautami..but often people arnt so sensible..esp when emotions take over...
its a sad part of life...but equally true...
take care!
@ sherry-cherie missherbes d
ReplyDeleteyes i agree..sometimes emotions take over making a complete ass of our sensible mind :(
and no matter how foolish we actually are being, everything wrong just manages to make perfect sense..
So sad, because it is probably someone's reality.
ReplyDeleteLove the form you chose to tell the story.
good one..
ReplyDeletewhy always sensitive stories.try some time funny stories..
awesome Pri!
ReplyDeleteahh well.. not the story of course.. but the way u put it :)
Amazing..
While my personal opinion stands more with Gautami's (hey, I'm probably the one girl in the world who HATED Romeo and Juliet), I get the fact that this piece is very much reality for some. I'm just thankful your particular story was fiction :)
ReplyDeleteexcellent...but its cyclic. we can say the same for both person, same words, different person, situations.
ReplyDeleteReality in a flash. Well done!
ReplyDeletecrimes of passion... they always leave us wondering why....
ReplyDeleteNice one!! But why is everyone writing sad stuff? Is it a kind of a projection?
ReplyDeleteso very sad, but very well done!
ReplyDeleteIt reads like reality unfortunately. The writing is too beautiful for the story
ReplyDeleteOoppsss.. quite morbid. And the theme seems to be sad endings??
ReplyDeletesad :( btw u know a guy killed his wife n hanged himself here in bangalore last week? too much!!!dont know how people go to this extent
ReplyDeleteu din give answers to my Q in previous posts comments :-/
ReplyDeleteVery nicely written.
ReplyDeleteReally!!
this is beautiful.
ReplyDeleteWhy is it that love... such a sacred emotion all of a sudden turns into an obsession, i wonder... *sigh*
Why did she have to end her life for tht person who didnt deserve her..bt alas HER LOVE WAS TRUE N LOYAL..... :)tht she knows n rest who cares ;) but yes then the "people'.........
ReplyDeleteKuch to log kahenge...;)
Nicely written....as usual m nt commenting any further..
Cmon guys is this what goes by nowadays in the name of poetry, and am I the only one who finds all the posts on here fake and corny. Its the usual fare(some of them like bollywood films) of some sad lover moping over lost memories lost opportunities lost loves, yes sorrow is what poets/writers live by, but all of this is all sooo cliched(dakyanoosi is the word that comes to mind), sounds like regurgitation of romantic classics and the pathetic attempt to have shock endings is just too predictable.
ReplyDeleteTo top it all, the comments oh the comments, in one voice they all praise as if the next arundhati roy has arrived..doesnt it ever seem suspicious that not one,not one seems to think any of the posts is crap, and is honest enough to tell you so.
And so I will be roundly condemned for pointing out the emperors clothes, but someones gotta do.
@ marcia
ReplyDeletethanks :)
@ blogboy
hmm yeps..next time around maybe i will :)
@ veens
thankyou veens though i myself am not too satisfied with the attempt...but thats the closest i could get without revealing too much :)
yea i actually witnessed this ..though fortunately she was rushed to the hospital on time...
@ tc
nobody loves sad endings tc ...but unfortunately this piece is inspired from reality...
@ ghost particle
ReplyDeleteim sorry i dint get what ur saying :(
@ tumblewords
thanks :)
@ paisley
well yes they do...and sometimes we are unlucky enough never to find the answers...
@ solitaire
well dunno about everyone...but this piece was inspired by a real life event i witnessed at the hospital...luckily she was rushed in time...but when i actually heard her out, i could understand what she must have gone though...
though i know suicide is criminal but sometimes things go beyond limits i guess and some ppl dont have any other choice but to give in...
sorry if the gloomy posts are getting typical but just had to get this off my mind...though had to be careful not to reveal too much...and so the 4-liner :)
@ jo anne o
ReplyDeletethanks for dropping by :)
@ pia
well u got that right pia..it is unfortunately inspired by a real life incident...
@ j
ohh i know..its getting a bit too much :(
ok from now on, atleast to compensate il'l try to live by 'nostalgic moments padhne wale happy happy' :p
heehee
@ asmita
yes i did read bout it in the news...but u know u cant really label a person as right or wrong unless u know the whole story...wch usually never gets out as it really is...esp in such cases...
actually this post too is inspired by a real life incident...and believe me, its much worse than it sounds...fortunately or unfortunately (i dunno what to call it) the lady survived...
@ abhishek khanna
lol...abhi i dont have any answers ...infact i hadent even noticed all those pointers untill u told me...but i did reply...chk it out *grin*
and yeah agar IT industry frustrating ho jaye, toh keep my suggestion in mind ok? :p
@ rohit
thanks rohit ...though i feel i couldent do it full justice :)
@ raaji
i dunno about it being an obsession raaji..but in this case it sure led to frustration of never being understood...
@ mad orchid
well i was one of the 'log' here so i decided not to say anything but place it as it actually was or atleast was told to me :)
frankly speaking, i would have said she was foolish to attempt it (attempt because luckily she was rushed to the hosp on time)...
but when i heard her out, i realised why she was driven to that point...
@ manoj
well manoj all i can say is sometimes truth is stranger than fiction :)
unfortunately this post was inspired by a real life incident i witnessed...the lady was my patient who was luckily rushed in on time by her sister and so she lived to tell the story...
if it wasent for the sister coming to chk on her (and that too on time) it would have pretty much ended there and then...
i couldent and dint want to reveal much for reasons of confidentiality but at the same time, was pretty disturbed by it and wanted to vent out..
and the poor attempt was probably the outcome...
thanks for the honest critism which i guess is subjective...but will definitely try to consider it...
but know sumthin and yaa i think u can take my word for it, sometimes its really very difficult to differenciate facts from fiction...(now this dosent mean u go about reading all my posts again and relating everything to reality...haha)
what seems like a corny bollywood flick to u might very well be the harshest truth of someones life...
so take it easy! :)
take care...
It reminds me of the recent suicide of guy after killing his wife.. because of suspicion.
ReplyDeletehmm .. so you are on a killing spree han .. and I thought doctors saved life ..
ReplyDeleteyou killer ..
ive said it before, ill say it again.. u have talent
ReplyDeletesad one and really sad to hear it was inspired by a real life accident. Sometimes i wonder what love can do to people :(
ReplyDeleteCan you write something more positive sometimes too? :)
reality is painful and beautifully written regardless...
ReplyDeleteGosh Pri. Kya kya dekhna padta hai na? So now is she going to go back to her husband?
ReplyDeleteA whole lot of meaning in so few words.
ReplyDeleteExcellent.
1)i agree with gautami
ReplyDelete2)i agree with manoj abt what he feels abt comments on crappy posts, most of the times they are not honest enough | thanks buddy you told exactly my words...
3)i agree with pri that yes things can be real sometimes but pri is silent on what moral correctness of what the girl did; after reading the post it gives an impression that pri agrees with what the girl did and justifies that too. hope pri doesnt mean to :D
finally i will stick to what gautami says, cause that is more real and sensible in my opinion
tc :D
- Me
written very beautifuuly:-))
ReplyDeleteSome how I dnt like sad endings...after all.....SRK said na..... ABhi picture baki hain mere dost:-))))
jus kidding....
very touchy!!
beautifully written...!!!
ReplyDelete"Love is selfless"... you have just proven that.
Cheers!!!
P.S: I have taken up this prompt as well... do check into my blog :)
@ rambler
ReplyDeletei read about that too...but was it based only on suspicion?? i dint know that....
pretty sad the approaches ppl take :(
@ anuj
well yes they do..we did manage to save her in reality :)
@ roshan
thanks roshan..but this was a half baked attempt inspired by reality without trying to disclose too much :)
@ lena
ReplyDeletesorry dear..but this was an attempt to get something off my mind...
my apologies for it sounding duissapointing...
but the good part (or so i hope) is the lady survived in reality :)
@ one more believer
it sure is painful and sometimes much weirder and lot more unbelievable than fiction...
@ solitaire
well as doctors, the least we could do is referr her to a psychiatrist..because she needs therapy...to get over somethings which i admit are rather tough...
yet unoffcially i offered her all the counselling she could in that state...
hope she dosent go back...
@ anthonynorth
thanks for dropping by :)
@ endevourme
well prasad, its really sad that u dint gather the guts to say so urself if u considered my posts crappy and waited for someone else to say something...
hoping next time u wont wait for a mouthpiece to voice ur opinion...lol!!
as for me, i dont and will never justify such an act..but yes i can understand why she resorted to take that step...
sometimes things get soo tough that its difficult to hang on...i know its cowardice to give up like that...but for a flash of a second, ur brain stops thinking and ur heart takes over completely and thats when u attempt such stuff...
neverthless i still think what she did was wrong and i wouldent support it ever!
@ chakoli
u know thats what i told her...though i dint use that corny SRK line because thought she might not take it well :D
but jokes apart, i just hope things work out for her and frankly speakin, i hope i never have to see her again...atleast not in the stage she was in :)
@ nisha
well nisha, i dint mean to encourage that thru those words..sorry if it sounded that way...
but u know what, i dont think giving up on life has or ever will prove any point...
this has actually happened to someone and she actually spoke of it being a proof of true love...and thats what inspired me to write that..esp the last line...:)
i hope though, noone ever tries to prove any point this way...
btw m nt in IT industry
ReplyDelete@Pri
ReplyDeleteThats very true, giving up on life is totally not acceptable.
but again, people sometimes end up doing crazy things.
/-well prasad, its really sad that u dint gather the guts to say so urself if u considered my posts crappy and waited for someone else to say something...
ReplyDeletei just agreed with him on crappy posts; doesnt mean this one is crappy hehe
...read the comment carefully pri :D
tc
@ abhishek khanna
ReplyDeleteoops!! :D
@ nisha
ya nisha..i agree...love does make u do crazy things sometimes :)
@ endevourme
i think u ought to read my reply carefully prasad...
i dint mention anything about this post...if u notice the s in post(s), u would know im referring to all or any of my posts...u r quite an old visitor to 'nostalgic moments'... no?
so was just surprised that u never once mentioned it before...lol!!
I agree with Marcia. How sad that this is probably reality for too many people.
ReplyDeleteIt seems too often the givers get tangled up with the takers.
why do u pick up such sad prompts pri ?
ReplyDeletethis was so real i cud see it