August 01, 2009

its complicated

A recent meetup with four close friends had us talking about social networking sites after around three hours of talking about everything else we could possibly think of.
after dissecting them piece by piece, talking about the various pro's and cons, the interference of ppl u dont really want interfering, the stupid quizzes we keep taking to kill time and the random crappy stranger requests i decided to raise the hottest topic and current obsession of everyone who joins these sites--the curiosity factor particularly about the relationship status.

while one friend admitted that facebook is now only restricted to curiosity element, another pointed out that the update about relationship status in these networks are never to be trusted..hmm..interesting!
the discussion further delved into the reasons for his controversial comment.and what followed was a huge animated discussion about the in-depth analysis of the human psyche which went something like this---

in a relationship status update on a social networking site,
what does "single" actually mean?
R: "ohh it means the person could be single" (please note here the usage of the words 'could be')

ME: "well, there are so many people out there who are committed and yet update their status as single.its mostly because of the insecurity in the relationship"

S: "it could also be the poor guy/girl is contemplating a breakup u know--benefit of doubt"

T: "i dont see anything wrong in that..why does he have to declare to the world that he/she is single..its none of their business"

what does "committed" actually mean?
R: "ohh it means that the person could or could not be committed" (yeah u guessed right.R is a lawyer and believes in sitting on the fence even if it means he gets a sore ass in the bargain.he is also the most skeptical human on this part of the globe).

ME: "ohh i think il'l agree with does'nt say much..maybe the person is actually in a relationship or maybe he wants everyone in the whole wide world to believe he is in one"

S: "maybe the guy really wants to be in one and the person he is interested in, doesn't really believe u know..just to prove a point or something" (ok insert a full volume laugh track here with S being the only person with a serious expression making us all doubt the reason behind his recent status change)

T: "it could also be possible that this guy or girl has gone through a recent breakup and wants to show his ex that he has already moved on.huh? huh?"

what does "married" mean?
R: after a long pause "means he/she is married"

ME: "means he/she is married..period!"

S: "it means 'buddy im married!'"

T: "it means married and brave enough to accept the fault"

(phew! ok atleast we have an unopposed vote on the honesty of this option)

what does "open relationship" mean?
R: "it means that there are no strings attached.u live your life your way and i will live mine and dont expect fidelity, monogamy or the stuff relationships are actually supposed to be made of from opinion--all good until one of them falls in love with the other--the other to whom it still is an open relationship..
that is when, my friend an open relationship becomes a CLOSED one!"

ME: "i wont judge anyone going for this.but personally i dont believe in open relationships.i think its just an excuse to have your share of fun--be commitment free and guilt free too!"

S: "wait! we are missing the point..why update it as a relationship status?and can a person have more than one open-relationship at the same time??" (goes into a dream like state while we leave him behind and carry on the conversation)

T: "well i dunno what to say..atleast they are being honest about both parties are in the know! its their choice after all.its better than being cheated on isnt i?" (we had to agree that was a valid point)

and now last but not the least *drumrolls in the background*
what does "complicated relationship" mean?
R: "it means that the guy or girl is the most honest person in the world..all relationships at some point are complicated.and thats easy to believe.."

ME: "and not to forget if he is contemplating a breakup, it will get complicated in a while again justified! and the last option, if he wants to prove a point to his sweetheart who does not believe him enough, then its soo TOTALLY there!!"

S: "yeah, besides if he is single, that means he/she either has not found the right person or doesn't want to which again makes it kinda complicated."

T: "ohh and just in case he is married, its still easier..its definitely complicated after marriage!"

and just like that, four friends sitting in CCD one rainy afternoon, came to the perfect conclusion of the perfect relationship.
its kinda sad that they still stick to the universal more socially acceptable and comprehensible versions when it comes to their own profiles..
but deep down in their hearts they know that there is in reality, just one unanimous relationship status which sums them all---COMPLICATED!!


Naina said...

hhahahhahahhaah... this was real stuff .. put across in a witty way.. there is no denying the fact.. the current relationship status of any tom dick harry could mean one of those things.. the friends are certainly very observant, witty and practical too..

Arv said...

yup... complicated... quite messed up actually :P

Sparkling said...


Yeah, I'd agree to that conclusion - everything sums down to complication - hell! I don't wanna be so negative now :)

Btw, I kinda think your friend 'T' does have a grasp on all things 'relationships'

Iriz said...

yeah, i'm quite curious about that
"complicated" ones. i mean you could assume more about that than singles and married. and if they are complicated then how complicated are they? less? more? somewhat? lol.

nice post pri, nice friends too!

rahul said...

haha.u r right.its always complicated :(

Suree said...

:Pso meaningful discussion ...

Karthik S said...

Good one, pri.


sri said...

haha this was fun. Except there are some morons like me who dont even know how to change the status and leave it that way :)

Yes it is complicated if u dont know how to keep it simple. Simple!

Pri said...

@ rane
lol!! those are my friends for you..but heyy there might be exceptions to the scenario too..not everybody has sucha twisted and suspicious mind u know :p

@ arv
well not always messed up..but complicated--yes!! :D

@ sparkling
no no..nothing negative about it..just a truth about all relationships or even no relationship for that matter..nothing in life is that simple u know
but then, its the complications and the attempt to sort them out that keeps us going :)
T will be very happy at tht comment of yours..atleast someone feels tht way :p

Pri said...

@ iriz
haha..yea u r right..i guess the 'complicated' status does increase curiosity afterall..and then questions like "how complicated?" can never really be answered can they?!!
but thanks to you, now we have a new topic of discussion--grades of complications!! ;)

@ rahul
c'est la vie my friend, c'est la vie!! :D

@ suree
glad atleast someone has managed to find some meaning in our idle banter :p

Pri said...

@ karthik
danke! u can count on us to come up with crazy conclusions like these :D

@ srivats
///Yes it is complicated if u dont know how to keep it simple. Simple!///

woww!! what a profound statement..all the complications and confusions aside, this one remark takes not only the cake but also the baker and the bakery too ;)


Pratz said...

well that pretty sums it up...nice post :)

IncorrigibleV said...

i will have to agree with this, but im still not updating my status on facebook :P

S said...

i wud hv 2 kill u if u hd put up our names ;)