March 26, 2011

looney tunes

I, pri, in my lifetime so far, have had the oppurtunity to talk to many a lunatics---some institutionalised (just in case you are wondering, they weren't my inmates.In my defense, i must tell you that i have worked as a resident doctor in a psychiatry institute and hence the experience) and some who were not (the world is no less than an asylum, innit?)

Anyhow, coming to the point of the post, here is an excerpt from an online conversation i recently had with one such non-institutionalised lunatic friend.
Please note---In case i dont live to see the light of day after this, please know that it was a MURDER!! *looks around nervously*

(me logs in)
me: YO!!!!!!
friend: whoaa!! you scared me
me: tht's nothing
i can rotate my head 360 degrees as well
haven't you seen me in 'the exorcist'?
friend: dat ws YOU??
9:24 AM
me: u dint know??!!!!!!!
friend: damn! i should looked so natural!
me: huh? whatever do you mean by 'looked'? i WAS NATURAL!
it was a 'no makeup thingy'
9:25 AM
friend: you dont need rear-views in ur car den
me: who said i have them?
you arn't the only genius around, you know...i got there first!! *does a quick victory dance*
9:26 AM
me: infact i dont even need a car most of the time...its only those days when i dont feel like flying..otherwise the broom usually manages that.
friend: on ur broomstck?
me: duh!
wasn't tht obvious?
friend: ya ya
9:27 AM
friend: so you go out on nites den?
me: hellooo...i need my beauty sleep u know
or how else am i supposed to manage such killer looks
i fly during THE DAY!!
friend: hmmmm..
9:28 AM
friend: u must be giving d poor birds a heart attack
me: nawww...the pet vultures manage all the small stuff
9:29 AM
friend: n they must be the ones bringin u your supper
me: well, i usually pick on dumb humans and chew off their brains on gtalk
friend: or do u prefer human food??
me: ohh wait, correction --dumb humans who are too excited to even read wht is typed
friend: got it got it
me: phew...finally!!!
9:30 AM
friend: u dint like my brains?
they still r thre
they taste awful dont they
me: they are??
man!! seems like i missed them ...for nothing!
i should use my microscope next time
friend: oh yes
what ws i thnking?
me: ok ok enuf of crazy bored!
friend: phew
u r bored of battering me down?
thngs have chnged
me: did i do that? when? how? why?
friend: hmmm
thngs reallly have chnged
9:32 AM
me: hmmm...really? i dont like changes
unless they are pleasant ones ofcourse
but you know uncle murphy, always howering around making sure they most often never there!
neverthless, you got any pleasant changes for me?
9:33 AM
friend: yes, am back online
me: *all eager waiting with bated breath*
friend: dats a change
me: i repeat
u got any pleasant changes for me?
and stop trying to change the topic like that
friend: mmm... nope
9:34 AM
me: yea...shud have known
i think i shud buy a vacuum getting bored of flying on the broomstick
9:35 AM
me: that way i could fly faster and disappear to haunt interesting humans instead.
what say?
friend: never tried...have been walking since the day i was born
me: *yawn*..nvm!
i sleepy.
friend: ok.hope i dont see u again.
me: HAH!! as if your hopes have ever been fulfilled.
over and out!! :D
friend: over and out!!

(me logs out)
(friend logs out)
Frankly i share this kind of comfort level with only a very few friends.
these are the kind of friends, you know you can talk to even on the toughest days without the fear of hurting them with the hatred you have developed for the world.
these are the kind if friends that can make your troubles seem light even without actually knowing any details, who do not mind being your punching bag at times, because they know you would do the same for them..
they understand you, irritate you, irk you, pester you and love you all the same.
they are not the prim & proper agony aunts (read 'shrink') who make you lie on the couch and offer advice in 30 mins sessions..not at all!!
rather they are more of the "shaddup and get over it" types, who try to distract you off your woes by telling you how silly you look crying.

So sharp is their sarcasm and mock hatred towards you, that you forget what you are sulking about and get engaged in their cynical battle of wits, instead.

While most people are just too normal to tolerate my twisted sense of humour, (their loss i say), these necessary evils, are the few blessed souls who share my insanity and respect it and im thankful to life for them *makes a straight face*

To sum it all--no cliched candyfloss conversations.
and yet i cant help but say---"tu hain toh il'l be alright" :)

BlogJunta - An ode to the Blogosphere

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Unknown said...

clap! clap! clap!
That was so sweet!Even I have a lunatic friend, even she is super-lunatic, uber-crazy and ultra-scary! And hey! She is a shrink too! And we curse each other all the time! Oh! I am so lucky! :') (that emoticon means tearful eyes and not runny nose!)

Anonymous said...

all these mock fights and pun is all in good spirit between friends.

i know what you are saying.i miss such conversations with a close friend.they meant a lot to me.
reading this has made me nostalgic

Chandana said...

I just threw out an old vaccum cleaner. Noisy, but it works. Just saying :P

Good read... crazy conversations always make me smile :)
And oh ya... those who can't tolerate your twisted sense of humour - totally their loss i say!

Dr Roshan Radhakrishnan said...

hehe.. that was a lovely conversation.. true.. I'd prefer those kind of friends over a pretenyious bunch any day of the week

Red Handed said...

hahaha....some friends no matter how sarcastic you get just hang out thr for you.

wonderfully written.

Ritz.. said...

Awesome ......... Loved your Quirky Sense of Humour ..... Without Friends like this Life would really be boring :))


Pri said...

@ tapas
yea i guess you are blessed then :P
wish you a life long friendship!!

Pri said...

@ anonymous

Pri said...

@ chandana
haha...maybe i will drop by sometime, especially to borrow that vacuum cleaner from you.

welcome to 'nostalgic moments' btw :)

Pri said...

@ pythoroshan
well sometimes its tough to tell the difference..some friends are just sane---doesn't mean they are pretentious..
but its always more fun in light talk than in pleasantries--keeps u smiling much longer once the conversation is over :D

Pri said...

@ red handed
yea, that is mainly cos they know you to tell to take offense at what you say (afterall its not everyday that yr conversation's drip
my life would feel soo formal without these 'il'l-be-there-for-you' friends..
i guess im lucky like that!! :)

Pri said...

@ ritz
true that!!
i am glad i have such people in my life who stick with me me despite all my crazy mood (swings) and they are glad that the feeling is mutual :D

Meera Sundararajan said...

Agree. Friends are people with whom we can be ourselves..! yes, i also crib and complain about my friends but I cannot do without them. Nice post!